LTU: Lil' Turkey Update

It's been awhile (six weeks, in fact) since I've done one of these - you know - exclusively about LT.

Last we checked in, little one was the size of a plum. Now look how it's grown!

That's right! We're EIGHTEEN WEEKS along, today!

It's amazing to think all that's happened in the last six weeks. I found myself becoming less and less sick, a little less exhausted, and growing a little more round in a particular area of my body. That and we got to hear LT's heartbeat again at our 16 week appointment!

In case you missed it...

Check this out on Chirbit

And while LT is a growin' things they are a changin'. Well, not so much that we can see from the surface, but it's just amazing to read - week by week - what's going on inside of me as far as baby's development. As far as my development goes, there's plenty to be seen on the surface. I haven't felt the baby move just yet (though I'm not certain of this as things just feel different altogether), but my hips and stomach most certainly remind me - everyday - there's something going on. I can't tell you it's all been fun. 

Learning to sleep on your side shouldn't have been an issue for me, because I'm a side-sleeper, but apparently my body revolted once it became my only choice. The ol' pillow between the knees trick has helped some, as well as my prenatal yoga - but there's rarely a morning that goes I'm not acutely aware of my hips. Loosening and becoming more flexible thanks to hormones, sure, but bearing the weight of new body positions has been a challenge. A welcome challenge, though.

In other news, I've purchased three maternity swimsuits for days lounging at the pool and our upcoming beach trips. There's not too much belly to fill them out yet, so I often feel like I'm just wearing a cute strapless top, which is actually kind of fun - minus the fact that they tend to float the surface, haha. Speaking of consumerism, looks like we're going to begin the fun of registering here soon - two of our three showers have been officially scheduled and I had my first "we're delivering and we're totally unprepared" dream - so I've decided to get my act together and at least get around to developing a pre-registering list. Feel free to chime in with those items you couldn't live without (or could) in the comments below!

In just two weeks and a couple of days, we'll know the gender and THAT is something I can't wait for!

My Pregnancy Is...

One second: Standing in front of the mirror admiring the sheen of my increasingly long hair. Turning my attention from my face to my skin and thinking to myself, "I think I'm starting to see the glow!"

About sixty seconds later: Standing in front of the mirror again, this time lamenting that coffee is not, unfortunately, as delicious coming up as it is going down. I wonder aloud, "now about that glow..."

LTU: Lil' Turkey Update

Last update on Lil' Turkey, he or she was about the size of this:

Then last week, he or she was about the size of this:

And now, Lil' Turkey's graduated (at TWELVE WEEKS!!!) to this:

While my morning-noon-and-night sickness hasn't entirely pulled an Elvis and left the building, it has subsided over the last couple of days - just enough that I've got hope that I won't be holding onto this much longer than my first trimester (which ends next week!). I've managed to, in the past couple of weeks, successfully garner the skills of expulsion in the car while driving, when out to lunch with friends, and while on the phone with my husband. Add that to my resume.

I am, just barely, starting to show and I have, thanks to Kate and Gabby, picked up quite an array of maternity clothes to help navigate this transition for my body. A transition I hardly think I'm prepared for, but become increasingly excited about as I watch everyone else around me becoming more and more expectant for some sign of what's going on inside of me. A life extending from within me into the world it will one day inhabit. Our sweet Lil' Turkey. Can't wait to hear the heartbeat in just a couple of days!

I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends

Today marks NINE WEEKS, y'all. And that's just crazy. Because here, we went from FOUR WEEKS + 1 DAY (when we found out) to EIGHT WEEKS + 4 DAYS (when we made it known to the www... aka "whole wide world") and now it's a full nine weeks.

Starting today, Baby Neeley (aka "Lil' Turkey") is making the size-transition from this:

an olive

 to this:

a prune

And momma and dadda are basking in the LOVE that has poured out to us and Lil' Turkey over the last couple of days (not that we were short of it to begin with from family and friends who knew before the big announcement).

I've not fared so well in the tummy department over the last week, as I went from a hardly noticeable slight queasiness at six weeks to non-consequential nausea at seven weeks to full-blown "thar she blows" morning, noon, and night sickness at eight weeks. Fortunately that progression has led me to try a variety of different things to help (trying to hold off on nausea medicine, if at all possible) including sour candies, ginger ale, saltines, green apples, and so on and so forth... hence the title of this post.

And now, I've narrowed it down to what I consider my trifecta of survival. It's made of a lovely cast of characters, including:

Oh my gosh. Lemon-flavored anything has been good, but none-too-filling. It's about all I can do to get my hands on lemon-water at restaurants, lemonade at Chick-fil-A (with half water, because it's so dang tart), or lemon candies. But this? This takes the cake. It's so filling, so satisfying, and so lemony without being too-tart or too-sweet. It's just perfect!

This is how I make up for the fact that what I try to put in my body often comes out. It's so delicious and has become my go-to for those moments when I feel like my sweet-tooth might push me over the edge, knowing full well this is giving me the nutrients I need WITHOUT making me want to run to the bathroom. It tastes like heaven.

What would I do without these? I mean, they're a classic for upset stomach but really it's about the only thing I actually want to put in my mouth that's not in some sort of liquid form when I know I need to eat but I just feel awful. I keep a sleeve in the car, in my purse, and of course, the rest, in the house.

So I'd say, overall, we're still in the survivin' stage of things with hope towards thrivin' coming soon. I managed to make it around the block a handful of times for a bike ride that lasted a whole thirty minutes and only caused one bout of dry-heaving (my nausea is both hunger AND activity induced, fun fun). I've barely been able to muster up the energy or stability for a decent workout before that... so I hope that changes soon. Everyone tells me swimming is an excellent preggo workout, so let's cross our fingers that I don't find myself with an aversion to chlorine when I head to the pool tomorrow!

Cat's Out of the Bag

Do you know how hard it is TO KEEP A SECRET?! (It might be why I've posted ONE, yes, count that, ONE, whole post since we found that and even it had it's minor clues woven in.)

I mean, we knew before. We've had our share of secrets to keep over the course of a lifetime. But March 18 to yesterday, April 18, felt quite like the LONGEST MONTH OF OUR LIVES. A joyous, challenging, awe-inspiring, and totally confusing month which added that time seems to go much slower these days made for a telling journey already.

A journey that started with two pink lines (after a week spent CONVINCED, both emotionally and physically that it hadn't happened this time) and will never end. And dear family and friends have been so kind as to remind us of the fact.

So far, it's been nothing like I thought it'd be. From the lessons learned in two rounds of minor disappointment (one of those turning out to be totally unnecessary) to the helplessness with which I feel in my ability to control any bit of this except for taking care of myself... it is a day-by-day journey towards trusting. And I'll be honest, I'm not sure how it is that people can do this without anchoring themselves in the truths, promises, and lessons to be found in scripture. And this is just the beginning... a beginning spent providing safety and nourishment for a life that will one day make itself known to the whole world. Then it will be everything else.

But I'm convinced already that God is in every bit of this adventure, and ask daily for His continued guidance. Too, I couldn't be more blessed that the father of our little turkey is the most loving, most patient, most perfectly made-for-me man in existence. He has been so present and attentive from day one (which was really our day one, but in the grand scheme of things day twenty-nine), and I can't help but know he's going to be an amazing father.

I'll try not to make the blog a preggo-only themed diatribe, but I can't say it won't be a topic of conversation. Because frankly, I've already got the mom-brain. Good thing, though, is now that the cat's out of the bag, I feel like I can actually say what's on my mind without cloaking it in words that SOME PEOPLE were clever enough to deduce even when I didn't mean for them to!

So, here's to a new adventure!

Just A -Tiny- Bit of News

Read it here.

A Highly Requested Recipe

I've only recently come to appreciate the Pumpkin Spice Latte (can you believe it?) and thus went about searching and tweaking and settling upon what I find to be my favorite order of things for this delicious fall drink.

Pum(mmm)pkin Spice Latte
makes 1 serving

Ingredients:
1 cup milk
1 tbsp canned pumpkin (or homemade puree, if you're especially resourceful - unlike me)
1 tsp honey (some recipes call for 1 tbsp sugar... I like mine w/ honey & less sweet)
1 tbsp vanilla extract
1/4 tsp pumpkin pie spice
1 shot espresso (if you don't have an espresso machine, 1/4 cup of strong brewed coffee is a good alternative)

Directions:
Combine milk, pumpkin and honey in a saucepan and cook on low-medium heat, until steaming. Don't forget to stir! Remove from heat, and whisk in vanilla and pumpkin pie spice. Pour into your favorite mug and add the espresso last! Of course, you can always dollop with a little whipped cream and added pumpkin pie spice.

In Other News (related to the accident)

Our car is going to be totalled.

SOB.

I wish you could understand why this is incredibly saddening to me.

But it's okay if you don't.

It's just an end to another era. And how crazy that of all times, it would be now.

An era when an eighteen year-old got her first car as a promise her dad made to her years before when he said "You get a full-ride to whatever college you want to go to, and I'll buy you a car." And he did, and I named it "Chin". Because at the time, I was positively obsessed (I was in denial then, but I'll admit it now) with Switchfoot. If you don't know the connection between that name and the car, I promise, I only think slightly less of you. (JUST KIDDING!)

It's a car that has, in the last seven and a half years, taken me to: Tennessee, Maryland, Virginia, Georgia, Alabama, Arkansas, Texas, Kentucky, Illinois, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Michigan, Ohio, and North Carolina. (Needless to say, at it's time of "death" it will have almost 100,000 miles on it more than it had when it was purchased.) It drove me to visit a boy I loved on our first summer apart. It was the site of countless impromptu steering wheel and air drumming concerts with okay vocals shared among friends. It was... a huge part of the memories of the last chapter of my life.

It's like the closing of one chapter needed a sound effect - or an impact - that would always stand as a symbol of what was next. But losing Chin and the memories and the significance of that car in my life is the bitter in the bittersweet.

Because the sweet, is of course, the blessing of being offered far more for the car than it is worth by the insurance company. And that it would be now and not earlier, when there's not as much pressure to get one today (though I only have the rental for another week). And that Cliff is a master at shopping for car deals. And that the new car, I am certain, will have it's own memories and journeys and discoveries... it's just a question of what kind to get now. The great debate? Something like Chin (i.e. a car) vs. something a little bigger with room for a (someday, not now, don't worry, we're not pregnant) family.

I like what Molly has to say on the matter (it's the reason she's one of my best friends).

mariagoeswest: i mean, you're life isn't about the commute anymore
mariagoeswest: it's about packing a lot of punch in your big dreams
mariagoeswest: meaning
mariagoeswest: get the suv
mariagoeswest: the space
mariagoeswest: for greatness!
mariagoeswest: : )
mrskneeley: I love you

But What of Winter?

My appreciation for the coming and current taste of winter has grown steadily over the last couple of weeks. But never more than now. It began, of course, with an everyman love of the holiday which finds itself conveniently supplanted just days after winter’s arrival. Brazen in it’s ferocity, it lingers in the air well before it arrives. Like the way the air smells before a glorious rain. There in the days leading up to Christmas, we all feel hope amidst the curiousness of cold. You can’t help but do so, when everything that crosses your path is littered with Christmas lights and there seems an ever-present holiday hum in the air.

But what of winter despite, or rather, apart, from the holidays? What of the premature darkness, the gripping frost, the lonesome gray? What of the layers upon layers required to even walk out your front door? Call me crazy, but I have come to love these as well. I love that winter will set itself apart in such stark contrast to those seasons which it seems the majority appreciate far more. It has a boldness to it that each season has, but one far less understood. Like the woman in the boardroom whom every man misunderstands because of her brand of strength in the workplace.

And winter? She strips herself bare for all the world to see and takes no precaution for hiding herself except to draw in the night a little earlier everyday. Her contours, oh, how evident they become when all the leaves have fallen. Tree-covered mountains once only a silhouette of green are now marked by each individual tree, its branches, and the ground below. Ground we don’t see when everything is green or orange or fiery red. Limbs hidden to us and weighed down by the leaves they feed and give life to.

And we? We have the audacity to call her depressing. We say she is far too ugly for our taste and only worth something with a dressing of white which some of us aren’t so privy to experience too often. Everyday we become more intolerant of her presence and wish for the glory of every other season in which we might find ourselves more comfortable. More inspired. More unburdened.

Isn’t it fascinating that we, in our most bundled up state of existence, bear witness to the lightness and freedom of the earth in winter? It’s beautiful and inspiring and sad and wonderful all at the same time. Because then, when we are free of the scarves and the hats and sweaters and boots and all, creation takes on a new form far less skeletal and revealing. During those seasons, we do enough revealing of our own to make up for her hiding.

Winter has taken company with each of the seasons as right, in my mind, as I believe I’m finally seeing in the coming season the worth she has and the lessons she teaches. Even more than the vibrance of Autumn, the joy of Spring, or the radiance of Summer, I find myself most in need of the promise of the lightness of being of Winter.

As Cliff Mentioned

And as you all evidently already know, Christmas preparations are in full swing, and I, for one, am ecstatic about it all. Just the first couple of notes of "Silent Night" on Mix Ninety-Two Niiiiiiiiiine... and I've lost it. Don't even think about singing "I'll Be Home For Christmas" around me or you're sure to get snot in your face.

But anyways.

The tree is up.



The Christmas cards have started coming in (and ours are finally designed and ordered!)



Cliff's cube has been decorated.



All but one Christmas gift has been purchased. We've had our fare share of Hot Nogolate around the house (uh, yeah, it's hot chocolate made with egg nog and milk). The Christmas parties have begun. We've sung carols a couple of nights with different groups of people. The decorations are still finding their way into new places in our home.









Overall, we're loving everything about this season despite its hustle and bustle!

I Cannot Wait For These

to start blooming.

February First

Even typing it I have as much trouble as I did in grade school understanding why we pronounce it "FebUary" when there is evidently an r after the b. This is a day to celebrate. Shortest month of the year, end of January, tomorrow's Groundhog Day is tomorrow, the sun's not in hiding yet by the time 4:30PM rolls around, Valentine's day marks the halfway point of the month, and, not to mention, the air gets (sometimes) just a tad bit warmer.

We had our windows open in the apartment today, for goodness sakes!

I'm starting to get the hang of this normal weekend thing. Sure, being sick is no way to spend your time off, but at least I've got a cute husband to watch (while he spends hours outside working on and cleaning the cars) and a stack of books I want/need/plan to read. I managed to join the world of the living today at church and I'm really glad I did. I knew I needed to be there, no matter how stuffy my head was or how badly I was coughing. I asked and heard "yes". And when Cliff asked why, I could only tell him I'd probably figure it out when I got there. And I did. I have put myself in a position, time and time again, of trying to rely on my strengths and to hide my weaknesses. But where is the growth or the challenge or the truth in that? I am only setting myself up to fail.

Church today was just another reminder to get out of the boat and trust that my feet will find footing on whatever surface the Lord has placed just beyond where I am comfortably standing (sitting, etc.). This is rather appropriate for where I find myself in my current line of work, my hopes for personal ministry and relationships, and for some new opportunities on the horizon. It's only fitting that an afternoon lunch and meeting with Zach and Jody at our place was to follow... more on that later.

So anyways. I'm hopeful at the start of this new month for a lot of reasons, most of which I know are going to push me in ways that I hope my immune system is prepared for.

Are you hopeful for February, or is it just simply one step closer to another month you're looking forward to?

Wowzers, Guys!

Our New Baby

Okay, so maybe it's less like a baby and more like a child.
And no, not the human sort nor the animal kind.

Today... we bought a car. Crazy!

Nothing fancy, but an incredibly reliable and well taken-care-of black 2001 Jeep Cherokee Sport with 94,500 miles, good mpg, and well... it's a Jeep.

And as we've put away for a new (to us) car over the last couple of months (knowing Cliff's '94 GMC Jimmy would someday need a new home) Cliff has only kept saying, "man, I'd love to have a Jeep again" (he had two Cherokees as a teenager). And guess what type of car I wanted when I was a teenager, but never got? A Jeep Cherokee. So, it's kind of like a dream car - only our version of a dream is probably different than others. Why? Because we paid with cash and saved a couple of hundred bucks off the market value - thanks to a sympathetic and kind fellow Lamponian selling the car.

The funny thing is, we haven't been looking all that hard or seriously. But this morning at 8:43, a Lampo Forum post was sent to Cliff's e-mail and there she was... in all her beauty.

We've traded phone calls back and forth all day, both Cliff and I and the seller. Cliff made the final decision on the buy sometime this afternoon (after taking a test spin). We drive her home, tomorrow and she'll join the ranks of our other 2001er, my little Honda Civic.

Now, we'll take our stab at selling a car for the first time. I have to admit that'll be a little sad, especially when I think about Cliff picking me up for the first time for our first date, and then our first kiss and all our roadtrips to Cleveland and to the beach in that great little SUV. Oh, the memories.

Anyone in the market for a well-loved Jimmy? Sigh.

Instead of a black lab, we got a black SUV. I guess that'll have to do for now...

No Resolutions

Just hopes.

Things that, if I could attain them in 2009, I believe would put me in a better place for 2010. Things that I think would make me a better person - more fulfilled and more like the version of me that I am meant to be - than I was in 2008.

So, this is what I'm thinking about this Sunday morning, January the 4th.

I want to be a better disciple. I have, in the last eleven years of my faith journey, had some really unique periods of growth. Times where I clung to my faith in the Lord because I knew it was truly the only thing that gave any and all of this meaning. I have found it more difficult in the good times, to grow the same way. And I'm kind of tired of that. There's so much good and bad happening in the world today - to our families and to people we love - that no matter how rosy our present situation is in life, we need God no less. And I don't always live like that. I don't study the scriptures or pray with the same tenacity when things are right as when things are wrong. And I think to follow Christ and to truly be a disciple, it means to have the spirit of learning and growing in Him everyday. And I want that for my life because it pours into every other part of my being because it is the source of my being.

I want to be a better wife. Surprise, right? No really, though, it's a novel concept and I'd very much like to serve Cliff in ways that honor both him and the Lord. Too often I am riddled with emotions that get the best of me. Plagued by selfishness that unfairly takes the best from Cliff. And sometimes too consumed with getting things right that I fail to see the value in my mistakes. I want to learn to compromise and to communicate much more effectively this year. And I guess, just to love more truly and deeply.

I want my family and friends to know they matter. I think I've really dropped the ball on this. Probably because my whole life, I've let moving away, transitions, and big things cloud my ability to be the one who calls... the one who makes plans... the one who does nice little things for no reason at all. I have become selfish in this area - particularly in the last year or so. Partially as a means of self-defense (who likes getting rejected, time and time again?) and partly because of frustration. Frustration that maybe I will always be that person who takes the first step, though I'd give to not have to every once in awhile. But how's that worth anything if the people I love most in this world don't know exactly what they're worth to me.

I want to flourish in creativity. Right now, I've got a lot of focus going on this photography stuff. And rightfully, so. It goes without saying, I want to continue with that - moving from practice to true service. Overall, though, I'd really like to develop a deepened knowledge and skill base in my photography while not losing my sense of passion and direction with writing and other creative means. I know that if I can not just hold onto but grow in these, that will set the stage for years to come. And I've got to keep reading and journaling, too, because it's incredible how much more freshly I can think when those two acts are habitual.

I want to lead well. Because the truth is, I'm finally leading. Now don't get me wrong - I know titles and jobs aren't what define an individuals role as a leader. But right now I've got responsibilities and relationships in my life sphere that I didn't have just a few months ago, nor was I expecting. I want to be incredibly graceful, mindful, and intentional about serving in my job in a way that belies my still growing confidence in myself and matches the confidence I should have in the God who put me here. I'd also like to step out beyond this role into some sort of community group or bible study for women, particularly those whom I know are seeking the same thing right now and just don't know where to find it. Let me know if that's you.

And I want to stop the struggle, once and for all. I've debated putting this one in plain language because in this medium, I've only ever been so candid about a certain aspect of my story. But I want to, because, well as some others have said about this kind of airing of dirty laundry, it holds within it a glint of accountability. So here goes... I have fought, tooth and nail, since a very early age to learn to love my body. It never occurred to me that the pursuit of some sort of ideal that was set by anyone else was wrong and a misguided way to try to live life. I know everyone struggles with this in different ways. But I have let myself become so victimized by what was done and said to me about my weight throughout the years, that I have now become my own enemy as an adult. No one else but me, now, is asking too much and not giving enough. No one else but me is letting the lies continue to play over and over again like a record that someone forgot to take off the phonograph. And I want to stop that, once and for all. I can proudly say that 2008 was the year I ended my struggle with an eating disorder I have had for nearly half my life. And I'd like for 2009 to be the year I get into the best shape of my life - physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually - and know that I am treating myself and my body with the care and respect it deserves. This might or might not have a number attached to it, but I'm a little less worried about that right now.


So, here's to hoping the best for 2009.

The First Snow-el

Man, last night was incredible!

All throughout the day, the forecasts were calling for precipitation but no accumulation of the snow-kind in our area. Sure, they said "south of Nashville" but threw in classifiers such as Tullahoma, Manchester, and a number of places much further south than our own quaint little Franklin.

When I left work early to prepare for last night's Division of Student Affairs annual Christmas party, it was sleeting. When I got out of Publix, where I was picking up my green bean casserole ingrediants, about a quarter inch of sleet had accumulated on my car. When I left the house after cooking for an hour, I stepped out into a winter wonderland, no lie. ACCUMULATION RIGHT HERE IN FRANKLIN. About a half-inch's worth, too!

It's been awhile since we've seen snow like this here and I loved it, even when it took me twenty-five minutes to go all of five miles to Andrew's house for the party. Oh, and an hour for Cliff to go about the same distance except on the craziness that was the interstate. We both had the same mindset. Turn up Mix 92.9 (which has been playing non-stop Christmas music), drive slow and cautious, and enjoy the beauty of this unexpected gift!

We got to the party late, but still managed to get some of the scraps left of everyone's wonderful food they brought as well as much green bean casserole as we can manage (and we still have a half of a huge pan left). Getting out was the hard part, so we just hung out talking and ended up being the last people to leave. The moment we stepped outside, I gasped aloud because it was just so beautiful. By then, the clouds had cleared and an almost full moon was out reflecting off the snow which cast a beautiful blue glow all around. I just wished it had snowed more!

This morning I waited a couple of hours before going in to work because our parking lot was relatively a skating rink. And wouldn't you know, when I finally got up to Nashville there was no snow. What's the deal?

It's December 1st!

And it's SNOWING! Despite the fact that it isn't accumulating, it is so beautiful and rather cheery. It's also the first day of my new job, so that's kind of fun.

We had planned to hit the gym this morning, but a later return home from Cleveland last night called for hitting the snooze. But I still woke up a little earlier than Cliff, opened up the living room curtains to watch the snow, settled into the cozy side of the couch by the reading lamp, and spent some time reading and reflecting on my Advent devotional for the day. I coudln't have imagined a better start to a new month.

I don't think I've ever been this excited on a December 1st. Thank you, Lord.

Steeped in Beauty

Poor Cliff's parents. Since we came in on Wednesday, we've only spent one night at their house. And poor us for making so many last minute decisions about where we're going to stay for the night. I'm getting kind of tired of wearing the same clothes in the morning as I wore the day before... and of having to borrow toothbrushes (thank goodness I'm not sick anymore). But I'll tell you what I'm not tired of: just being out here.

We did manage to slip away from the farm into town to shower with our own toiletries, change clothes, and brush our teeth at Cliff's parents' house. But only to come back out here, this time to the "house on the hill" (otherwise known as the beautiful, ginormous house that Brad and Wendy have built for his mom). Brad grilled up some of his famous burgers and I, with a full tummy, retired to "the study" to read (rather, skim through) some of the really cool books in Bobbie June's massive collection. Before I knew it, I was fast asleep and the Bentons kindly offered to let us crash in the front bedroom - the one on the corner of the house that overlooks the mountain range around the lake... Chilhowee, Big Frog, Sugarloaf, Chesnut. And that meant we had the whole beautiful house to ourselves! I tried to wake with the sun, but missed the sunrise over the mountains by about thirty minutes. But even then, they were still breathtaking in a beautiful blue haze they get their name from. I sat on the edge of the bed watching the smoke rise up from the mountains and listened to nothing but the quiet snore of my sleeping husband. It was so incredibly peaceful. Peaceful enough to curl up again with a book, reading the morning away.

And then I realized something. That being out here, mixed with my hunger for reading about "mysterious" and "wondrous" places in the world, has given me a severe case of something akin to discontentment - even erring on the side of sadness. Now, before you go getting all worried about me or something, I'm fine. It's just that when you are surrounded by quiet, rest, and beauty here, it's easy to wish that every waking, living, and working moment were just like these. And that's what I'm wishing for. And I know great views, green pastures, and little contact with civilization aren't the only places to find beauty... it's just that it's so much easier to recognize here. Easier even, to breathe.

This is the part where the city-girl in me gets trumped by the country-girl, which is an interchangeable dance. How is it that I can find such solace out here, when at other times I feel so enlivened and recharged by the pulsing beat of walking downtown in a large city like Seattle or Chicago? Gosh, I sound like a crazy person. But I guess that's okay. God made me this way and my husband puts up with me, so what more can I do?

I just want to be steeped in beauty, always.

A Thankful Game [Cliff]

Kristine e-mailed these questions to me, and here's what I have to say:

Something Functional in my house that I'm thankful for is:
The Toilet. Also, the shower.

Something about my body that I'm thankful for is:
You probably don't want to know. But I guess, also, my health and legs.

Something hard that I've been through that I'm thankful for is:
Living in Africa and being at West Point.

Something about this country that I'm thankful for is:
That we can have a transition in governmental leaders without militant action even when we don’t all agree together.

Something about 2008 that I'm thankful for is:
God meeting all of our needs.

A word I'm thankful for is:
Hope.

A sound I'm thankful for is:
Being able to hear wolves howl and an Elk bugle.

A place in nature I'm thankful for is:
Mountains. More specifically, the Grand Tetons and Yellowstone National Park.

A Thankful Game [Kristine]

God has given us much. We all have countless reasons to be thankful in every circumstance.

Here are some specifics:

Something functional in my house that I'm thankful for is:
The stove. Spending time cooking over our electric eyes or anticipating the goodness of something baking in the oven is what I spend a lot of my time doing at home. So, that just makes sense.

Something about my body that I'm thankful for is:
I have learned, recently, to be thankful for a lot of things about my body. But if I have to pick just "something", then... I love that my feet, my legs, and my lungs have carried me to heights I never dreamed of reaching. Like this one.

Something hard that I've been through that I'm thankful for is:
Having my heart broken by the person I love most in this world. In that sense, I have known the depths and the heights of our relationship in a way that has taught me more about grace and mercy than possibly anything else. I am a stronger woman, a greater friend, and a truer companion because of this. And he is a stronger man, a greater friend, and a truer companion because of it, as well.

Something about this country that I'm thankful for is:
Freedom and the right to be uncommon.

Something about 2008 that I'm thankful for is:
Travelling to new places in the world with my best friend.

A word I'm thankful for is:
Hope.

A sound I'm thankful for is:
Laughter.

A place in nature I'm thankful for is:
This place.



How about you?