Counting the Days

I posted awhile back about how seeing five months without being terrified by it was all about perspective. Flash forward to now, and five months (or one hundred and fifty days, to be exact) is now fifty-nine days. Fifty-nine days until I see Cliff again. It's so hard to believe. It's funny that I don't typically post about things like this because I know people hate mushy stuff. I don't relaly know what I think like that, though; first of all, it's not really mushy and second, there would have to be people reading this to form an opinion and I'm not so worried about that. Ha!

Anyways, I digress...

The last week has probably been one of the more difficult, in regards to the distance between Cliff and me. Fortunately I have hit landmarks (60%!) and been busy with work and school and life, but there's no amount of business and days happiily crossed off that can replace the companionship of the one person you are closest to in the whole world - your best friend. This is especially true when that one person is on a much-needed vacation that has him internet-less and unable to keep me up to date on how he's doing and what he's up to.

E-mail has been such a saving grace these last three months, minus the occasional satellite outages, the transitions to new locations, and well - this vacation. It's funny how you can grow so accustomed to it; even funnier when you think about standing face to face with that person again after five months of being apart and having conversations in stagnated chunks and spacial time. Comical, really.

So, I just kind of keep hoping. Hoping that I'll hear from him soon, because I should have by now - atleast his plans more than a week ago should have allowed him to be back in Nairobi in the land of internet again. I've been afraid to hope, lately, because of fear of being let down or disappointed - but I realize I'm the only one doing the disappointing by not allowing myself all the room in the world to "get my hopes up," "have high hopes," and "keep on hoping."

And just because I haven't heard from him doesn't mean something's wrong, which has been a learned lesson in "Communicating With Someone In Africa, And Sudan Of All Places 101." He's in good hands, I know - I'm just ready to hear that for sure.